Manners & Etiquette of 1871

Taken from the 1871 Cuyahoga Falls Reporter:

1. Avoid all expression which tend to irritate, embarrass, mortify or pain any member of the family.
2. Never allude to any fault or failing, unless with the purpose of benefit, and then in private.
3. Avoid sarcasm, bitter words, “sore” subjects, and reference to any personal deformity.
4. Do not ridicule, nor hold the opinion of others in contempt.
5. Give attention when addressed, and do not interrupt nor speak when another is talking.
6. Never contradict.
7. Never scold.
8. Keep your temper.
9. Never speak in loud or querulous tones, nor order in arbitrary or arrogant manner, child or servant.
10. Use no slang phrases, nor rude, disrespectful, profane or inaccurate language.
11. Never omit the “please” and “thank you,” “good-night” and “good morning,” nor fail to gratefully acknowledge by some word or look every act of kindness and attention. These little words oil the harsh machinery of life wonderfully.
12. Do not enter, even your nearest relation’s private room without knocking.
13. Never slam the doors, sit in the windows, hum, whistle, or sing in the halls or passage; nor scream to persons out of windows and up stairways.
14. Teach children to offer precedence to each other, and to their superiors, to avoid awkward positions and movements, and not to indulge in disagreeable or filthy personal habits, such as yawning, scratching the head, picking the nose, hawking, sitting on the floor, cleaning the nails in company, etc. etc.
15. Hold the person and personal possessions of another sacred. He who observes this rule will not tickle, nor punch, pinch, nor poke his friend or brother; will not, unless he has special permission, open his letters, rummage his drawers, mark his books, finger his clothes, nor use his private property.

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Things That Are Very Foolish

For a young man to think he does himself credit by hanging around theater doors, smoking bad cigars and paying for expensive oyster suppers, in order to be called “liberal” by a clique of youth as soft in the brain as himself.

For a lady to be annoyed because gentlemen do not always give her the best half of the street or the nicest seat in the omnibus. She should not forget that these conventional courtesies are not her right farther than they choose to concede them.

For an unfledged clerk to think he must buy extravagant gloves and cravats for every festive occasion, because Jones, whose father is worth thirty thousand dollars, does so. The best way of proving his manhood, would be to let such things entirely alone – self denial is better than fortune.

For a girl to think she is establishing her character as a young lady of fashion by allowing her mother to toil through all the drudgery of the house, and then investing her money in gaudy brooches and artificial flowers.

For a man to suppose himself a gentleman because he touches his hat to a party of splendidly dressed ladies, while he scorns to extend a helping hand to the old apple women struggling across the street.